here’s a fun idea!
but kids refuse to eat this
death by chocolate

Note: I could catalog everything I did wrong to get to this result, but that would take a while.  Silver lining?  The next time I have an festive occasion calling for a decapitated victim of a tar and feathering interrupted, I know exactly what to do.



sometimes I miss you
even though you’re exactly                    there
because you won’t be

Note: I drove home alone from the beach today, up Hwy 101 from Manzanita to Hwy 26. It’s a corridor like the ones characters in movies drive through to show that they’re leaving one part of their life behind and approaching another. With the “Stranger Things” soundtrack as my own personal backdrop, I let tears roll for the last first day of kindergarten, and the piece of me that will bounce off into the world in the most official of ways. I call this process pre-mourning. It doesn’t seem to help, really, but it’s a bit like those patent medicines that claim to shorten your cold. Prove it didn’t!

Also:  I know, I know, I counted the middle line on my fingers, too.  Remember, it’s “Bad” Haiku Corner.

I Forget


if I made a list
of everything I forgot
it would all be here

Note: I do make lists. If I forget to put something on the list, though, it no longer exists in the universe until I need it 200 miles from home. We are going home tomorrow. All the things will be there, unless I forget some here.

It’s You

Dear Jane

I thought it was me

but then your Dear Jane letter

was in Comic Sans


I used Comic Sans for years as my professional e-mail font.  While it may have been seen as a clever manipulation meant to tempt people to underestimate me, it was really because I thought it looked nice and I had no idea.  It sort of worked either way.  Now I’m getting attached to Ebrima, which probably telegraphs that I’m a circus clown, or that I’ve been underwater for the last 40 years.  *shrug*  I like it.