The Uslurper


I add things, I admit,
To my coffee every day.
But when You decided to add You,
Well…You got carried away.

A tiny exoskeletoned expropriator landed in my morning coffee.  Happily, I noticed the interloper before he drank too much.  Then we followed the rules for the insect kindom:  Is it small?  Yes.  Is it slimy? No. Does it like to hang around on something disgusting? No.  OK.  Fish him out and finish your sorely needed coffee.

A Nice Idea


the flameless candles

were a nice idea, I guess

until she ate them

Thing Two (who is no more than two) is the one person in our family who will pop something into her mouth and then ask, “What am I eating?”  CANDLES, honey.  You are eating Mommy’s expensive flameless candles.

PS.  I would love to have you participate with your own bad poetry about my inspiring topic.  I mean, such a moving photo that I took in my house with my iPhone, right?  You can’t resist!

Haiku, Do You?

Haiku, Do You?

bad haiku corner
syllables over substance

Just as a minivan can make a natural vista more ordinary, Americans have spent many hours making the haiku an egalitarian effort.  ANYONE can write one, including third graders (be honest, how many of you wrote about your pets?) and there is no Board of Haiku Preservation to put a stop to it.  Given that, I think we should have some fun.  Not an incredibly original idea, I know, but I have been known to send professional e-mails entirely in haiku, or biblical verse, or Pig Latin.  I’m in withdrawal.  So…. I will occasionally post a picture with a starter verse.  Any poetry is welcome.  If iambic pentameter is your thing, fly that freaky flag in the comments.

Yes.  I know that last line only has four syllables.  Now you get it.