103° Pacific Northwest

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103 in Oregon
Feels like the face of the sun.
I’m used to dressing in layers,
But I don’t know dressing in one.

This vest is sleeveless, at least,
Even if it’s filled with down.
Maybe the fingerless gloves?
They’ll be cool while we walk downtown?

We already wear nothing but shorts,
Check my hiking boots, they’re Arctic Fox.
My ski hat will shield my head from the rays
While sweat puddles up in my socks.

I clearly don’t know the keys
To hot weather survival and dress.
Five minutes outside, I’m a goner.
Call the coroner to scrape up the mess.

You hot, wicked Devil, you Sun,
Put your clouds back on, scorcher of retinas!
You’ve proven I’ll never be cool,
Now go away and play with your nebula.

Note: I took that picture by sticking just my arm out the back door at 8:00AM this morning. It physically hurts my eyes to look at the picture, let alone go outside. We are the naked mole rats of America, and we are not made for this weather.

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One thought on “103° Pacific Northwest

  1. Haiku to Heat

    Portland, how you suck.
    I moved here to get away
    From Denver pit stains.

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